trying to fix what's damaged (read0write) wrote,
trying to fix what's damaged

Title: The Porn Critic
Pairing: Suho/Chanyeol/Kai
Word Count: 2249
Summary: Self proclaimed porn critic Park Chanyeol rates an amateur's video, who is less than thrilled with his criticism. So it's up to Park Chanyeol to show that what he says is right and he has just the method.
A/N: written because of kaihanbitches's tweets asking for porn!au so this happened (and looking back i kinda skipped a few details XD)

Chanyeol claps his hands, rubbing them together in glee. “Time to see what’s new in the world of porn.”
His hands quickly move to pull up his favorite porn site and quickly scanning the page, he clicks on one.


“Hey, Suho, we got another message.” Kai motions from his spot in front of their computer. It had only been 3 hours since they posted their porn video and already it was getting lots of comments and feedback.
Suho walked over and leaned over Kai’s shoulder to check out the latest message.
Good lighting. Good use of space and positions. One bad thing: the moans sound very fake. Other than that, everything was good for an amateur status. P.S. cute dicks.
“What the – who is this person?” Suho peered at the name.


Chanyeol raised a brow as he saw an incoming message. He grinned, noticing it was from the amateur video he had just watched.
Who are you to judge our video? You self-proclaimed critic. Like you know what moans are real or fake and I’ll have you know our moans were real.
He chuckled as he quickly sent a reply.


Suho and Kai read the message.
“What the – who does this guy think he is?” Suho growled before pushing Kai away from the computer. He started furiously typing with Kai watching amused behind him.
Before Suho could press the send button, Kai stopped him with a hand on his arm.
“Suho, I think you should rethink what you just wrote.”
Suho tilted his head before turning to look at the screen. He gasped before quickly deleting and retyping his message, toning down his anger.


Chanyeol scoffed reading the amateurs’ reply. “How cute but such an amateur.”
He shook his head, making some “tsk”-ing sounds. “Can’t take criticism. Just trying to make them better porn stars if they’re going to upload videos.”
He quickly typed a reply and sent it, leaning back in his chair, whistling a happy tune.


“Hey look, he attached something.” Kai clicked the attachment to the message.
“This is how moaning should sound.” The sounds of quick strokes accompanied by deep low moans had Kai and Suho frozen in their spots. The unexpected deep tone was having a strong effect on their bodies.
Moving as one, Suho and Kai came together, hands slipping into pants, as moans filled the room.
After a quick handjob, Suho collapsed onto Kai, resting his head on his shoulder.


Well your moans don’t sound anymore real than ours.
Oh really, then why don’t you come here and prove it? Let me show you how a porn video should really be like.


Suho and Kai nervously stand in front of the apartment building. Judging from the outside, it was well maintained and situated in one of the wealthier parts of town. They glanced at each other, holding hands tightly, before Suho rang the button for apartment 12.
“Uh yes, um hello, this is Suho and Kai and –“
The sound of a lock unlocking catches their attention. “The door is open. Come on up.”
Suho and Kai walked in, heading towards the elevator. They pushed the button for the 12th floor and waited. The elevator opened up to a large foyer and a tall, lean man with a bright grin greeted them.
“Hello, Suho and Kai, and welcome to my home. I’m Chanyeol, porn critic extraordinaire.” Chanyeol smiled brightly, stopping in front of the couple, arms spread wide in welcome.
Suho and Kai exchanged glances. They hadn’t expected him to be so tall. He was taller than Kai, which was saying something.
Suho recovered first, crossing his arms and staring at Chanyeol with a haughty expression. “So you’re the self-proclaimed critic? Well, what gives you the right to know what’s good and bad? What are your qualifications?”
Chanyeol’s smile widened as his eyes began to twinkle. “So we’re just going to get right down to it huh? I like that.”
Before Suho or Kai could respond, Chanyeol had pulled Suho into his arms, lips coming down to cover his. Kai stood frozen as he watched Chanyeol practically devour Suho’s lips.
Chanyeol pulled back with a grin, tongue tracing his lips, as he looked at Suho’s dazed expression. “Not a bad kisser. But let’s see your skills.”
Chanyeol’s arm came out, snagging Kai around the waist and pulling him close for a kiss. Suho had a front row view of Kai and Chanyeol’s tongues dueling.
Chanyeol smiled into the kiss, feeling the beginnings of an erection from both guys. He pulled back, smiling at their dazed expressions, tints of pink on their cheeks. “So shall we move to the bedroom?”
Chanyeol pressed a kiss to Kai and Suho’s cheeks. “Then follow me.”
He led the way to a spacious master bedroom. The room was bright with sunlight as a breeze had the white curtains billowing softly into the room. There was a giant bed in the middle of the room, sheets already tangled into a heap. Some chairs and a table were set by the window where a balcony could be seen overlooking the city. There was a chaise lounge and chairs set up around an entertainment system. A desk with a computer was set up on the side.
Suho noticed his and Kai’s video was pulled up on the screen. “So, watching our video again?”
Chanyeol looked over at his computer. A smirk spread across his face. “I needed to familiarize myself with your style. It’s quite amateur but it’s better than most amateur videos.”
Suho scowled. “Amateur? How…Kai, shall we show him how professional we actually are?”
Kai noticed the gleam in Suho’s eyes and grinned. He moved behind Chanyeol, wrapping his arms around his waist, placing his lips at the base of Chanyeol’s neck. Chanyeol choked, seeing Suho get down on his knees in front of him.
With a mischievous grin, Suho leaned his head into Chanyeol’s crotch. His hands came up, quickly unbuttoning his pants. His teeth, catching on the zipper, slowly pulled it down. He smiled, seeing the half-hard bulge, and placed a kiss on the clothed erection.
Kai’s hands had moved under Chanyeol’s shirt and up his chest, fingers coming up to play with his nipples, his mouth gently suckling against the side of Chanyeol’s neck.
“Let’s take this off.” Kai quietly whispered into Chanyeol’s ears. The shirt was quickly removed; at the same time, Suho removed Chanyeol’s pants and boxers.
Chanyeol’s eyes went wide, unsure of which sensation to pay attention to. Then Suho was gripping his dick as he sucked the tip into his mouth.
Suho looked up at Chanyeol and noticed Kai’s gaze on him. With a subtle nod of encouragement, Suho opened up his mouth and took more of Chanyeol in.
Chanyeol buried his hands in Suho’s hair as his dick was engulfed in a warm, wet heat. He would’ve looked down but Kai turned his head for a kiss, tongue invading his mouth.
Suho watched Kai and Chanyeol making out as he pulled off, letting his hand slowly stroke Chanyeol’s cock. He grinned as he held the tip and stuck his tongue in the slit.
Chanyeol choked, pulling away from Kai and staring down at Suho’s triumphant expression. His tongue came out again to tease the slit. Chanyeol’s hands tightened.
Kai moved away and settled on the bed, back resting against the headboard. He watched the scene in front of him, hand lazily stroking his cock to full hardness.
Suho’s head bobbed up and down as he brought Chanyeol to the brink. He flicked his tongue against Chanyeol’s slit, pulling a gasp from him. His tongue teased the spot below the tip, causing Chanyeol to tighten his hold in his hair. Suho let Chanyeol’s cock slip from his lips, licking around his mouth.
Suho looked up with a teasing glint. “More?”
“Later, let’s see how your moans stack up in real life.” Chanyeol motioned his head towards the bed. “Let me watch you fuck him.”
Suho raised an eyebrow but said nothing as he moved over to Kai on the bed.
The kiss was open-mouthed and filthy, Suho’s hand moving down Kai’s body to his entrance to tease. Kai pulled away with a moan, angling his hips to give Suho better access.
Chanyeol had a small smile on his face as he lazily stroked his cock. He moved over to his nightstand, hand rummaging around for lube and condoms. He tossed the bottle and a condom to Suho who blindly reached out a hand.
Suho grabbed the lube, uncapping and squeezing a bit into his hand, slicking up his fingers and sticking them straight into Kai’s hole.
Kai moaned but did nothing as he let his legs fall apart. Suho took that as an invitation and began scissoring his fingers. He knew Kai liked the rough touch but also since they had sex not too long ago, he was still prepared enough.
After a couple of thrusts, Suho pulled his fingers out. He rolled on the condom and lubed it up before thrusting into Kai.
Kai gave a loud moan, wrapping his legs around Suho’s waist. “Come on, Suho, give it to me.”
Suho grinned, bracing his arms on either side of Kai’s head and let his hips move. Moans filled the room as Suho fucked Kai.
Suho was getting into the rhythm when hands gripping tightly on his waist stopped him. He turned his head and found Chanyeol standing behind him with a shit-eating grin.
“I think that’s enough.”
Suho glared. “You don’t – mmph.”
Chanyeol leaned down, kissing Suho roughly on the mouth. Their tongues fought for dominance, neither giving up. Chanyeol pulled Suho back against his body, never letting his mouth rest. His hand reached down to Suho’s cock, roughly stroking it. His hand slipped off the condom, tossing it away.
Kai watched the power play above him and frowned. He sat up and tried to wedge his way inbetween.
“Hey! Don’t ignore me.” Kai pushed hard, getting Suho and Chanyeol to break apart.
Chanyeol looked at Kai with a quirked brow. “Oh, then come here.”
A smile flitted across his face as he pulled Kai closer. Without warning, his head came down, taking Kai’s cock all the way in. At the same time, Suho’s hand came around to Chanyeol’s entrance, a finger teasing touching it.
Chanyeol made a choked noise, pulling a moan from Kai, as Suho brought a lubed finger to Chanyeol’s entrance. It was a tight fit but Suho was surprisingly gentle as he fingered Chanyeol’s entrance. His finger crooked up, touching a spot, making Chanyeol moan low and deep around Kai’s cock.
Kai’s hand clutched tightly at Chanyeol’s head. “Oh gawd, his mouth. Do that again, Suho. He takes cock like a pro.”
Kai’s eyes rolled to the back of his head as Suho’s fingers pulled another moan from Chanyeol. “Oh yeah, that’s it.”
Kai accidentally bucked his hips but Chanyeol accepted it like it was no problem. A small smile lifted the corner of Kai’s mouth. He braced his feet on the bed and began thrusting his hips, fucking Chanyeol’s mouth.
Suho watched with a grin. He slipped another finger inside, watching Chanyeol’s hole swallow his fingers. He slowly moved them in and out, scissoring them, before slipping a third finger inside.
Chanyeol choked but continued sucking Kai’s cock. He moaned deeply as Suho fingered his entrance. He crooked his three fingers up, causing Chanyeol to moan out loud, letting Kai’s cock fall from his mouth.
Kai sent Suho a glare, who just leaned over to give him a chaste kiss.
“Don’t worry. He’ll be sucking your cock in no time.” Suho’s signature smirk crossed his face as he covered his cock with a condom and placed it at Chanyeol’s entrance.
With a slow pace, Suho gently eased the tip in. Chanyeol gasped, unfamiliar to the intrusion. Suho waited before easing more of his cock into Chanyeol.
“Gawd, he’s so tight.” Suho gritted his teeth as he tried to fight against just thrusting into Chanyeol.
“Suho~” Kai, frowning, wiggled in his spot.
“Hold on, babe. Just let me…” Suho gave a few testing thrusts. Chanyeol gave low moans, enjoying the slight burn and sensation of being filled. His hips thrust back against Suho’s.
“Alright, babe. Kai, stick your dick back into his mouth and I’ll treat you two to some great sex.” Suho grinned, waiting for Chanyeol to take Kai’s dick into his mouth again before giving a hard thrust. Chanyeol made a choked sound as Kai moaned, feeling Chanyeol’s throat vibrate around his cock.
Suho’s smile widened as his grip tightened around Chanyeol’s hips. He pulled out and thrust back in.
Chanyeol wasn’t sure what to pay attention to: the cock in his ass or the cock in his mouth. He had never given much thought to be stuffed in both ends but found he was enjoying it, especially if it was with Suho and Kai. He could see the pleasure on Kai’s face as his mouth worked around Kai’s dick. The sounds coming out of his mouth left something to be desired but it could be worked on, with more practice of course.
Chanyeol grinned around Kai’s length before his tongue was touching the spot beneath the tip. Kai moaned, hands tightening in Chanyeol’s hair.
“Gawd, his tongue is amazing.” Kai’s hips started moving, fucking Chanyeol’s mouth.
Suho gritted his teeth as his thrusts became rougher. Chanyeol was caught between the two, sensations filling his entire body. He tried to thrust back but was met with hard resistance. He whined around Kai’s cock, which just pulled a moan from the boy.
“Man, this boy is a pro. He could be on camera if he wanted.” Suho grinned as his hips moved faster. He could feel his orgasm nearing. He looked up to see Kai getting close. His hand reached down to grip Chanyeol’s cock, roughly stroking it in time with his thrusts.
Chanyeol felt his stomach tightening and quickened his mouth, wanting Kai to come before him.
With a low moan, Kai came in Chanyeol’s mouth. Chanyeol swallowed with a satisfied smirk before moaning loud and long, coming into Suho’s hand. A few moments later, Suho came inside Chanyeol.
The three collapsed in a tangle of limbs onto the bed. Suho pulled out of Chanyeol, took off the condom, tied it, and wrapped it before setting it on the nightstand to be tossed later.
Kai, seeking warmth, immediately cuddled into Chanyeol. Chanyeol gave a low chuckle but wrapped his arms around Kai.
“Does he always get sleepy after sex?”
Suho smiled as he settled on Kai’s other side. “Yeah, it’s cute, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, but you know your moans aren’t any better in real life. It’s still pretty fake sounding.”
“What?!?!” Suho sat up, glaring at Chanyeol, who just laughed.
“But it’s nothing that can’t be fixed with practice.” The wiggling eyebrows caused Suho’s anger to fade as he chuckled as well.
“Well, if you’re going to offer, I don’t think I can refuse.” Suho leaned down, leaving a gentle kiss to Chanyeol’s lips.
“Now go to sleep. We’ll grab some food before we get back to practicing. With my help, you’ll move beyond amateurs to pro status.” Chanyeol grinned widely before cuddling close and falling asleep.
Suho scrunched his face before giving a small quirk of his lips. He shook his head but settled down besides the sleeping duo for a quick nap as well. He was going to need his strength for another round.

A/N: sorry i skipped on details but hopefully it's alright :T
Tags: one shot, r/nc-17, suho/chanyeol/kai

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